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If Skaters Ran the World

Will Angiulo
January 7, 2022

A couple of friends gathered in the basement of their parents home were getting baked one day and came across an interesting thought: What if skaters ran the world?

If skaters ran the world the streets would be designed like skateparks and every road would be perfectly paved. Communities would gather in thousands to skate the city streets everyday. There would be no potholes, no security, and no bullshit; just skateboarding with friends and good times. No douche bag security guards to ruin our day or dumb signs warning us that skateboarding is illegal in a certain area. Cities would pop off every night with parties in the streets, punk rock and rap concerts would go for days on end and drugs would be passed around like pen and paper.

Streets full of hot, naked chicks throwing their tits in your face

If skaters ran the world the streets would run free with pride, positivity and parties. It probably wouldn’t be the most sanitary or safe place but it definitely would be lit. Streets full of hot, naked chicks throwing their tits in your face.

No more bullshit adults to hate on us for no reason. The stigma of religions would be tossed to the ground and trampled over while we parade provocative graphics of Satan and hilarious parodies of the brands we hate. Street art would flourish and we would come to see a renaissance of graffiti art combing with the true underground cultures of skateboarding and music.

If skaters ran the world

national parks would be national skateparks, monuments and landmarks would be everyday skate spots, and the streets would be our home. Modern architecture would transform to incorporate structures specifically designed for skateboarding. They say the world is our playground but if skaters ran the world, the world would be our skatepark. There wouldn't be any kids on scooters getting in the way or equally as annoying parents telling us what to do. If skaters ran the world, the world would be a doper place.

Artwork by Graham Speiler

If skaters ran the world

we would take over the crazy night clubs in Vegas, LA and NY and there would be no last call. We would own the skyscrapers with penthouses that you only see in movies. We would work with scientists to control the weather so that whenever it rains we can turn that shit off and continue to skate. We would figure out how to time travel in to the minds of our future selves to figure out what must be done in the present…. Or maybe we will just think we can do all of that because all of the acid, mushrooms, coke, and other drugs we have done.

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